The two types of food in China

There are two types of food in China: 'Hideous' and delicious'.
Actually that's not true, it is slightly more graduated. But most food fits into these two categories. Let me explain.
There are two types of food in China: 'spicy' and 'not as spicy'
For example, we went to a food place tonight where they cook up vegetables you select. When it's finished the chef asks if you want spices in it. If you nod he heaps it in. If you shake your head he only gives you one spoonfull. There is no 'no-spicy' option.
There are two types of food in China: 'Western' and 'Chinese.' Chains like McDonalds and Starbucks are prevalent over here. And if you thought Starbucks was expensive in New Zealand, think again! It's hideously expensive to buy Western food in China, presumably because the market isn't as large. The Spicy chicken Fillet burger at McDonalds is totally delicious though. I've had four of them so far. Yep. KFC sell fish burgers, as we discovered quite accidentally.
Chinese food is usually a bit cheaper, but you risk eating something that may not agree with you, or eating something you don't agree with! Most of the people in our class have a moral objection to eating sea horse, for example, because they're endangered. Of course they're endangered, they're the most ridiculous animal on the planet! They're the dodo bird of the sea. I would eat one, but I don't want to deprive a snork of his steed.
At the night markets I have also been offered cat, dog, sheeps balls, live fish, centipedes, cockroaches, beatles and goats penis, all of which I politely declined. I did partake in the fried scorpion and a little bit of snake though.
Just a man with his scorpion.
And pear soup. I don't know.
The fried scorpion was pretty nice. Crunchy-like. The snake was rubbery, like chewing on a tiny bike tyre. No one was quite as keen on that. Observe:
Judith about one second after chowing down on some snake.
I am really missing sweet things. My sweet tooth yearns for goodies! They have snickers bars here, and ice cream but, which is the last thing you want to eat in this weather and anyway it's too expensive. Fruit tends to be what the Chinese have for dessert. The best food I have found over here so far is called zanza. It is fruit on a stick, coated in toffee. Like a toffee apple, but with more variety. I have had kiwifruit, strawberry, apple, mandarin, pear, tomato and these strange little Chinese apples that are quite delicious. The last one you can also get coated in peanuts.

Kids in my class will know about the dragon fruit, because we studied it in Reading and it ended up being one of those things we talked about all year. So when I saw one at a stall I had to buy it. It was actually not tasty. But Judith seemed to like it.

There are two types of food in China: food in wacky packaging and food with no packaging.
Pepsi bottles have the Chinese Gladiators on the side. Which is funny because they're such tiny men they just look like glam metal stars from the 80s. It would be like giving me a nerf gun and calling me a NZ Galdiator. Fun fact: Chinese don't understand the word 'Pepsi'. I don't know what they call it, cos it's written right there on the side of the bottle.
There is a chocolate bar called 'Guts'. Disturbing. But funny when I asked a sick classmate if she'd spewed her 'guts' out. Ha!

Dave called it with the chips. Blueberry is the best flavour. I tried braised pork but just couldn't get into it. I'll bring you some back, Dave!
So maybe there are a few more than two types of food in China...